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Be Your Own Life Coach! - #2 What's Been Stopping You?

Updated: Dec 6, 2023

In the last article I asked you to pick a goal, a target or outcome that you would like to achieve. Did you pick one? (If not, dig out the last issue, or just pick a goal now).



Then I asked you to imagine achieving it, in great detail, fantasising until you felt how it would feel to actually achieve that goal. I then suggested to imagine interviewing yourself after you had achieved your goal, to hear yourself explain how you succeeded in achieving your target. The answers you give in this “interview” outline the steps required to achieve your goal.


So, now that you know what you want and have a good idea of what’s needed in order to get it, let’s look at the task closely. Like I said last time, we are going to do things in a way that is slightly different to your “normal” approach. To get different results, we need to do different things! Step by step.


Knowing your goal and thinking about what you need to do to make it happen, ask yourself the following questions:


When exactly do you want it?

Will you be losing anything positive if you get this?

Is there any reason to not want it?

What will you gain by making this happen?

What do you need in terms of people, help, resources, etc. in order to achieve this goal?

What do you already have in terms of skills, talents, contacts, knowledge, and personality?

Could anything possibly go wrong?

If you REALLY wanted this, could anything stop you?

Are any other better alternatives available to you?


So, what’s stopping you from making the change now? If this is still something that you really want, you can now know what you already have, what you still need to get and the action you now need to take, to be successful.


What has stopped you before? Was it a feeling by any chance? A negative thought that you have about yourself? Is it a doubt about who or what you are, your abilities, or your “luck”? If so, let’s look at that feeling, because this is your current “state”. Ever hear of someone who is not in a fit state to do something?


Feelings are caused by thoughts. What thoughts are causing your negative feelings? When you know what these thoughts are, take a look at where you got them. Were they things someone told you? Was it something that happened to you before? Did you believe someone else, when, in fact, they might be wrong? Have you, by any chance, given up on everything based on one, or just a few, past experiences? Remember, the future is not the past and need not be the same, unless you choose to make it so.


Become consciously aware of these negative ideas about yourself and how they make you feel. Look again at past experiences. Then question them, like a lawyer! Are you sure they are really true? Can you really prove them? Examine them with hindsight and your adult, mature, experienced mind.


When you realise that most of them are wrong, you can dismiss them and get on with your project.


In the next blog post, we will start to think and speak the truths and new, more positive

ideas, firstly to ourselves and then to others!


Remember, everything that I cover in these articles I can help you to do in a clear and focused and faster way than doing it alone. Just contact me for details or a chat about your situation right now.


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